My entire life has been composed of stages…

Stages that require resilience and recognition. I believe that resilience is both a choice and a tool for uncovering your truest potential and wildest dreams.

The last few months have been a whirlwind of emotions for me. I came back to London after a short hiatus from the international modelling industry and this time felt so much more real. After visiting my calm, collected home in Canada, I was met with excitement, traffic, and new challenges. It felt as though I had hit the ground running in an overwhelming way. Last year was my first surreal year as a model, I was able to graze multiple publications such as Vogue, Warner Bros., the Daily Mail, and more. I had found myself alone, across the entire world truly finding myself and practicing my passions.

How was I able to manifest all that I had worked for?

Perception can be tricky and life can be difficult to understand at times. I feel as though many people view the success of others as overnight or seamless. However, this is almost never the case. Although there is no right answer, I found myself trying to find a recipe for success anyways. First, I thought about the people who inspired me, then looked at myself. Now, I think it is important that I express that the definition of success has changed for me. For a long time I saw success as timely and measured by money, but, I now see success as having abundance, love, and ultimately making your passion your profit. And yes, I do believe that in this context, I am truly successful.

This realization and feeling of gratitude didn’t come easily and my tendency to always chase a dream or higher goal threw me off in the process. It was my ability to take failures and rejection in stride and bounce back that helped me realize that life tests your spirits and therefore builds your resilience.

Resilience is my recipe for success.
resilience

/rɪˈzɪlɪəns/

noun

1. 1.

   the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.

2. 2.

   the ability of a substance or object to spring back into shape; elasticity.

Resilience means being able to adapt to life's misfortunes and setbacks. Test your resilience level and get tips to build your own resilience.

When something goes wrong, do you tend to bounce back or fall apart?

When you have resilience, you harness the inner strength that helps you rebound from a setback or challenge, such as a job loss, an illness, a disaster or a loved one's death. If you lack resilience, you might dwell on problems, feel victimized, become overwhelmed or turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as substance abuse, eating disorders or risky behaviors.

For me, it was risky behaviours that eventually led me to a serious eating disorder when I had endured the most amount of hardship and adversity in my life. I allowed myself to fall apart and failed to separate hard work from discipline and abuse. The less I practiced resilience, the more I allowed life to beat me up. I saw myself as a victim and blamed luck. I put my dreams on hold and failed to acknowledge my potential. I eventually hit rock bottom and weirdly enough, I believe this is what made me the resilient individual I am today.

I decided I would either choose to fall apart or at least try putting myself back together. I began to treat rejection as redirection and allowed my failures to teach me valuable lessons as if they were a coach and I was just finishing the second half of a tough game. I switched my perspective and changed the narrative. I was no longer a victim but life was teaching me lessons and making me stronger so I could get back, get up, and hit harder. I promised myself I would come back stronger and looked to outlets such as modelling and social media as my platform to do so. I found this funny because these were the two very things that broke me in the first place. Taking the things that broke you and hitting them ten times harder to me is resilience. Bouncing back and striving.

Resilience won't make your problems go away — but resilience can give you the ability to see past them, find enjoyment in life and better handle stress. If you aren't as resilient as you'd like to be, you can develop and learn skills to become more resilient.

Adapting to adversity

Resilience is the ability to adapt to difficult situations. When stress, adversity or trauma strikes, you still experience anger, grief and pain, but you're able to keep functioning — both physically and psychologically. However, resilience isn't about putting up with something difficult, being stoic or figuring it out on your own. In fact, being able to reach out to others for support is a key part of being resilient. I owe my closest friends and family for who I am today. When it came time for me to admit that I was struggling with my future, health, and desires in life, they were there to allow me to vent and persevere. Reaching out to others can be extremely vulnerable but also powerful. Being real is power and verbalizing your inner narrative will ultimately level you up.

Resilience and mental health

Resilience can help protect you from various mental health conditions, such as depression and anxiety. Resilience can also help offset factors that increase the risk of mental health conditions, such as being bullied or previous trauma. If you have an existing mental health condition, being resilient can improve your coping ability. We all have different circumstances and lives but that does not mean that we cannot accumulate the same tools to get ourselves through them.

Tips to improve your resilience

If you'd like to become more resilient, consider these tips:

• Get connected. Building strong, positive relationships with loved ones and friends can provide you with needed support, guidance and acceptance in good and bad times. Establish other important connections by volunteering or joining a fitness or spiritual community.

• Make every day meaningful. Do something that gives you a sense of accomplishment and purpose every day. Set clear, achievable goals to help you look toward the future with meaning.

• Learn from experience. Think of how you've coped with hardships in the past. Consider the skills and strategies that helped you through difficult times. You might even write about past experiences in a journal to help you identify positive and negative behaviour patterns — and guide your future behaviour.

• Remain hopeful. You can't change the past, but you can always look toward the future. Accepting and even anticipating change makes it easier to adapt and view new challenges with less anxiety.

• Take care of yourself. Tend to your own needs and feelings. Participate in activities and hobbies you enjoy. Include physical activity in your daily routine. Get plenty of sleep and create consistent bedtime rituals. Eat a healthy diet. Practice stress management and relaxation techniques, such as yoga, meditation, guided imagery, deep breathing or prayer.

• Be proactive. Don't ignore your problems. Instead, figure out what needs to be done, make a plan and take action. Although it can take time to recover from a major setback, traumatic event or loss, know that your situation can improve if you work at it.

I want to acknowledge that I am here because of the resilience of my ancestors, grandmother, and mother. These women endured hardship and adversity so that my load would be lighter. These women inspire me to practice resilience each and every day.

If you are reading this and still find yourself struggling to acknowledge your resilience. GET BETTER. Get better at championing yourself and realizing that life itself requires resilience. Whether it’s going through the stages of life, accepting rejection, trying out for a team twice, or even just simply making it through high school… high school requires the most resilience! You did that. The fact is, we are all resilient, it is just a shift of mindset that needs to happen to make it a tool and everyday weapon. Do a few things every day to make yourself a bit more resilient. Whether it’s practicing gratitude, getting stronger physically, or simply trying again. You got this! And trust me life does not always go to plan but we must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us. This does not mean letting go of your dreams and passions but shifting, moulding, amending, and coming back with resilience. - Your future self is waiting for you.

This was a shoot that I did in NYC when I finally signed to an agency there. It took me three years to do this and I knew why it happened this time around. I wanted to give light to the power I had reclaimed for my body. I thank resilience. I was able to bounce back from an eating disorder, societal expectations, cultural expectations, and truly accept who I am and how proud I am of her. My resilience became contagious and attractive. I find that it has translated to my confidence and made me more desirable to work with. I walk in to every job, agency, and room knowing that whether the answer is yes or no, I will still walk out grateful for the opportunity. My happiness no longer relies on instant gratification and yes’s. I am resilient and I am me.